Kanye West Was As Modest And Humble As Ever At The VMAs

August 28, 2016 / Posted by:

When it was reported that MTV was giving Kanye West 4 minutes to do whatever he wanted at the VMAs, I figured that he’d come on stage completely naked, sprawl his legs out in front of a three-way mirror and jack off to his own reflection with one hand while finger blasting his asshole with the other as he screamed his own name. And I was right! Sort of. Kanye did that in speech form.

Kanye walked out on stage and he rambled out a stream of messiness about calling Taylor Swift, the violence in Chicago, oppression, comparing himself to Steve Jobs and Walt Disney and his wife being a “G” (and in this case “g” stands for GiganticFameWhore). He also shouted out Amber Rose. It was like his Twitter come-to-life, and it was also like the kind of coked-up Ted Talk that makes you tell yourself to never watch a Ted Talk again. Nobody loves hearing Kanye speak (I could stop right there and it’d still be a fact) more than Kanye loves hearing Kanye speak:

And after mess, he played his video for Fade for starring Teyana Taylor. This video is Flashdance wrapped in Janet Jackson’s Pleasure Principle and covered with a thin layer of Cremaster and two thick drops of Jocelyn Wildenstein’s cat saliva.

That terrifying “Thundercat on human” shit is the reason why my eyes will stay wide open tonight.

And here’s Kanye with Kim who wore a dress that made her look like she’s got a 3-foot long vagina (“So what you’re saying is that her vagina looked smaller than usual.” – your ass)

Pics: Splash

Our commenting rules: Don't be racist or bigoted, or post comments like "Who cares?", or have multiple accounts, or repost a comment that was deleted by a mod, or post NSFW pics/videos/GIFs, or go off topic when not in an Open Post, or post paparazzi/event/red carpet pics from photo agencies due to copyright infringement issues. Also, promoting adblockers, your website, or your forum is not allowed. Breaking a rule may result in your Disqus account getting permanently or temporarily banned. New commenters must go through a period of pre-moderation. And some posts may be pre-moderated so it could take a minute for your comment to appear if it's approved. If you have a question or an issue with comments, email: michaelk@dlisted.com

src="https://c.statcounter.com/922697/0/f674ac4a/1/"
alt="drupal analytics" >