The “Suicide Squad” Fancrazies Will Not Stand For Rotten Tomatoes Defaming Their Precious Movie!

August 3, 2016 / Posted by:

In my post yesterday about Suicide Squad getting hit with a giant wave of crap reviews, I said that it had a 34% on Rotten Tomatoes. As of press time today (I am a serious journalist speaking serious journalist talk!), it has a 35% on Rotten Tomatoes. It jumped a whole 1%! But I doubt that minuscule push toward a fresh tomato is going to be enough for the hardcore Suicide Squad fans to put away their sharpened shivs and stop threatening to butcher Rotten Tomatoes so they can drink its tomato tears of pain. Some fans have had it with RT writing bad reviews about Suicide Squad and have started a petition to get it shut down. No word if someone else has started a petition to send those Suicide Squad fans to a “The More You Know” class where they will be taught that Rotten Tomatoes only aggregates reviews and doesn’t actually write them.

As The Hollywood Reporter points out, the petition on was started by a fan named Abdullah Coldwater who is accusing Rotten Tomatoes of being prejudiced toward DC movies. (Note: RT is owned by Fandango. Warner Bros., the distributor of Suicide Squad, owns 30% of Fandango.) That other DC movie, Easter Island Statue In A Cape v. Easter Island Statue In A Cape, only has 27% on RT. The petition reads like this:

We need this site to be shut down because It’s Critics always give The DC Extended Universe movies unjust Bad Reviews, Like

1- Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice 2016
2- Suicide Squad 2016

and that Affects people’s opinion even if it’s a really great movies

When several people pointed out that Rotten Tomatoes is only the messenger, Abdullah Coldwater dropped in this clarification:

A petition definitely won’t shut down the site

The aim of the petition is to deliver a message to the critics that there is a lot of people disagree with their reviews.

A lot of people the supporters and the opponents of the petition act like we are already going right now to shut down the site

not it’s just a way to express our anger

The petition has over 12,000 signatures so far.

I’m thankful for that petition for shedding light on the fact that people have different opinions about stuff and sometimes critics write things you don’t agree with. I did not know this before. But damn, these fans are acting like Suicide Squad dicked them so good that their body went numb and then made them chilaquiles, paid their monthly car note for them and scrubbed their bathroom tile grout until it sparkled like in the commercials. It’s just a movie. Specifically, a movie that will still make a zillion dollars no matter what.

I get it, though. The greatest thing to happen to cinema, Showgirls (which is about to be restored), has an illegal 19% on RT and that is a hurtful crime. But do you see me whining about how RT should pay dearly for that? (Cut to me using LegalZoom to threaten to sue Rotten Tomatoes because I can no longer eat salsa, pasta sauce or any other tomato product without busting into tears over how they are treating Showgirls!)

And here’s Suicide Squad’s Cara Delawhatever with her dog in London, as well as pictures of Jared Leto looking like he jizzed out a swirly stream in his pants.


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