Allison is out today, because it’s National Lasagna Day, and even though it’s an American holiday, she still takes it very seriously. So it’s just you, me and the legendary elegant blossom Samantha Fox!
Celebrity Big Brother started up again in the UK yesterday, and it feels like every season, the producers try to stretch the definition of “celebrity” more and more. They’ve outdone themselves this year, because if you’re not British and don’t follow British TV, the list of “celebrities” will have you saying “WHO?” so much that your co-workers will think that an owl somehow got into the office. But that’s okay, because Samantha Fox is in there and she has enough star power to fill up the house, the city of London, the country of England and the world!
Here’s the cast of People You Have To Google Big Brother 2016:
Samantha Fox – World famous goddess!
Chloe Khan – World famous natural beauty, glamour model and rejected X-Factor contestant.
Aubrey O’Day – The American mess who was sculpted out of a Bronzer stick and was a member of Danity Kane.
Frankie Grande – Social media mogul, brother of a donut terrorist and the visual definition of UGH.
Christopher Biggins – An actor.
Heavy D – The “star” of Storage Hunters UK who is NOT the rapper Heavy D.
James Whale – A radio host.
Katie Waissel – An ex X-Factor contestant.
Lewis Bloor – A reality trick from The Only Way Is Essex.
Marnie Simpson – A reality trick from Geordie Shore.
Renee Graziano – The grand dame of Mob Wives.
Saira Khan – A talk show host on Loose Women. (No relation to Chloe, I think.)
Stephen Bear – A reality trick from Ex On The Beach.
Grant Bovey – A “property magnate.”
Ricky Norwood – Fatboy from Eastenders.
What really bothers me is that nearly every site covering this important show has called Samantha Fox an “ex glamour model.” Calling one of the biggest pop stars in the universe an “ex glamour model” is like calling The Pope an “ex bar bouncer.” For shame. But you know, they should really refer to Samantha Fox as a “selfless saint,” because the ultimate act of kindness is her lending her A-list power to this show.