Somebody find a nanny to console Ben Affleck. Tom Brady has thrown in the jock and finally accepted a four-game suspension from his gig as QB for the New England Patriots. “Deflategate“ is finally over! (We really need a new scandal suffix.)
Brady has been fighting his suspension from the NFL for allegedly deflating footballs during a 2015 conference championship game for over a year. This was serious for Tom Brady! He took it all the way to the Supreme Court! Nobody wants to be seen on Monday Night Football just standing beside the Gatorade cooler on the sidelines with the lower tier coaches in the less-expensive Starter jackets.
“It has been a challenging 18 months and I have made the difficult decision to no longer proceed with the legal process,’’ Brady’s post stated. “I’m going to work hard to be the best player I can be for the New England Patriots and I look forward to having the opportunity to return to the field this fall.’’
Tom’s arch-nemesis, NFL commissioner Roger Goodell, better watch his ass if he ever has to come to Massachusetts. He better head right to Gillette Stadium. Avoid Boston, Rog! Hell, he should stay out of Cambridge, too. They probably won’t know who he is but just to be safe. Writing about sports is exhausting. If some hot gossip pops up about a celebrity quantum physicist, I’m passing it to Allison.
On a lighter note, you may have read that I’ve been graciously appointed the new weekend guy here at Dlisted. For me, it’s sort of like a thong-clad Joe Manganiello arriving to tell you that you won Powerball. I wouldn’t say I’m “over the moon” or #blessed but it’s in that arena without sounding like an ass.