I always confuse the National Enquirer with the far better and much more reputable Weekly World News. So naturally when I read the headline above, my mind immediately went to Dr. Phil calling up his lawyers after reading the headline WALRUS WEARING SUIT SPOTTED KISSING WOMAN WEARING HUMAN MASK. But that’s not the situation we’re dealing with today.
According to The Daily Mail, Dr. Phil and his wife Robin McGraw are suing American Media Inc., who owns the National Enquirer, for $250 million. Dr. Phil and Robin, the woman who trots off stage with him at the end of every show, claim that the National Enquirer have published more than 80 false stories about them over a 13-year period. Dr. Phil worked out the average, and according to the lawsuit, the National Enquirer pumps out a fake story about him and his wife every two months. Stories like how he’s a cheater, or how they’re headed for divorce, or how Robin kicked him to the curb.
Dr. Phil is pretty adamant that the stories are 100% fake. Dr. Phil and Robin will be celebrating their 40th anniversary this August, and he claims there has never been talk of divorce or separation during that time. And that’s why they’ve gone the lawsuit route. Dr. Phil told The Daily Mail:
“Enough is enough, it’s time for them to own up. As a member of the media, I have a deep respect for the First Amendment. But it does not protect these people who knowingly print lies for money, particularly lies about my wife.”
Apparently Dr. Phil threatened AMI with a libel suit before, and they agreed to stop writing lies about him and his wife. But the National Enquirer was back at it once they remembered how much money they make from stories about Dr. Phil being a sleaze.
Dr. Phil’s lawyer, L. Lin Wood, thinks they will win. Dr. Phil’s lawsuit was filed in Florida, where AMI is based. That’s also where a jury awarded Hulk Hogan around $140 million after Gawker published clips of a sex tape. L. Lin Wood says there are a few parallels between the two, and that Hulk’s trial provided insight into how Florida juries react to companies publishing private information about famous people for profit.
Although it’s not about the money. Oh no, L. Lin Wood maintains that what Dr. Phil and Robin really want is for the National Enquirer to stop publishing lies about their marriage. Uh huh, I’m sure Dr. Phil’s lawsuit isn’t about getting that money. But that’s not to say I’m not here for a bitch getting money. In fact, I’m wondering if he’d be willing to let me throw my own name of that lawsuit and turn into a class-action one, if only for this specific cover:
Honestly, nobody should be subjected to the mental image of Dr. Phil’s balls jangling around in those sheer white shorts while they stand in line at the grocery store. Caitlyn Jenner might be interested in signing her name to that lawsuit too. Whoever is responsible for Photoshopping that picture of Robin in the top left clearly ripped off Caitlin’s look.