I am all for ToTay’s shameless world PR tour as long as they keep bringing that hot piece bodyguard (at least I think that’s a bodyguard) with them…
It’s been a little less than two weeks since
the start date of Taylor and Tom’s contract Taylor Swift and Tom Hiddleston’s authentic love grew on a rock in Rhode Island and since then, they have moved faster than two U-Haul lesbians on speed. They went from Rhode Island to NYC to Nashville where Tom dad danced at a Selena Gomez concert and met Tay Tay’s parents. From Nashville, they took their “We’re Really, Really In Love” tour international when they visited Tom’s mom in England and Taylor’s stylist did her up in “old-fashioned English country girl” drag for a completely and private walk with his family and a dozen or so paparazzi on Covehithe Beach (see: the spontaneous and organic pictures below). And now they’re in Italy…. To Rome with UGH!
Taylor and Tom strolled through the Colosseum in Rome today, and she must’ve graciously let the paparazzi have the day off, because it was her fans who took pictures of them and posted that mess on Twitter and Instagram. They probably ended their day at a studio where they practiced riding a Vespa for their Roman Holiday-themed photo shoot for the paps tomorrow.
So, since they’ve met each other’s parents and are in Europe now, I fully expect them to elope in an extremely private ceremony in front of the Eiffel Tower at 11 in the morning on Wednesday. Their honeymoon in Bora Bora will be live-streamed on the Jumbotron in Times Square on Friday and they’ll show off the Baby Alive doll they adopted together outside of St. Mary’s Hospital in London on Sunday. They’ll be divorced a week from today and Tay Tay will get custody of their Baby Alive doll.
But seriously, ToTay is looking so damn fake that it almost defeats the purpose of a PR relationship. Maybe this is one big performance art piece and Taylor’s artistic commentary on how her relationships are perceived by the media. Naw, I’m giving her ass too much credit.