It has been over two months since Lindsay Lohan confirmed she was engaged to her Russian trust fund piece Egor Tarabasov. And ever since then, most of their public appearances have been limited to shopping trips and beaches. But last night, they made their first official red carpet appearance as Mr. and Future Mrs. Russian Millionaire at something called the Caudwell Children Butterfly Ball in London.
Now we know why Lindsay wasn’t able to appear at the mini Mean Girls reunion in person yesterday; she had an ultra-exclusive event to go to. Sorry, Damien, but the Apricot Ashtray doesn’t have time to fly to Toronto for your event. She’s rich Russian arm candy now. Sure, it’s an unwrapped candy that fell on the floor at least a dozen times, smells like cigarettes, and is covered in germs and questionable hair, but candy is candy.
It was a very fancy event because Lindsay’s man Egot wore a tuxedo. (My computer keeps auto-correcting his name to Egot, which is as close to an EGOT as Lohan will ever get.) Meanwhile, Lindsay wore a dress that may or may not still have the price tag attached, and it may or may not have been bought by Egor and it may or may not have gone back this morning. “I know it was purchased using a credit card belonging to Mr. Tarabasov, but I already told you: I want a cash refund. And those stains were on the dress when I bought it.”
Here’s more of Egor, who I’m pretty sure asks for the Jake Lloyd Mugshot every time he goes to the barber. And Lindsay who is starting to look like she was made in the same factory as the CGI Spice Girl marionette fairies from the “Viva Forever” video.