Will Arnett Brought So Many Young Women To Set, Megan Fox Joked Craft Services Should Start Supplying Lunchables
If I’ve learned anything from Megan Fox’s promo tour for Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows, it’s that her thoughts are powered by a stoned hamster casually strolling on a wheel made of dried sage stems and crystals. She’s talked about string theory and the pyramids and how the baby currently living inside her is a telepathic real estate genius. On Conan last night, it looks like she finally gave the hamster a night off, because she stopped giving us more crystal shop knowledge. Instead she channeled her inner Jeff Ross and put on an impromptu roast of her TMNT co-star Will Arnett and his skirt-chasing ways.
Will is a horny single 46-year-old Hollywood actor, which means the recommended age for his dating pool is women who were conceived during the final season of The Commish. So of course Will had a rotating lineup of young ladies joining him on set every day during filming. And when I say “young“, I mean young enough that it made Megan wonder if she should bring in some of her kids’ Lunchables from home to give his girlfriends something to snack on as they waited for him.
“They were progressively getting younger and younger as the weeks went on, and it got to the point where I was like, ‘Buddy, I’m worried. Should I talk to craft service and make sure they have Lunchables for your girlfriend?’ There’s no food here with cartoon characters on it.”
How young were these girls that Will was bringing to set? Should Chris Hansen be concerned? I think the biggest clue would be how excited they were to be on set. See, anyone under the age of 18 would be bored to death watching a bunch of grown men wearing CGI suits covered in motion-capture ping pong balls. An of-age starfucker, on the other hand, would be like a kid in a candy store. “Ooooh, do you play Matthewangelo or Donatello Versace? Are you getting paid a lot of money for this? Listen, here’s my number. Knowing Will Arnett, I probably won’t be back tomorrow, so give me a call?”