Leave It To Kelly Osbourne To Add Another Layer Of Messiness To Her Dad’s Cheating Situation
Just when this whole Sharon and Ozzy Osbourne breaking up ESCANDALO was dying down and the media was moving on, Kelly Osbourne has stepped onto the stage and has kept it alive by dousing it with gallons of pure liquid foolery. If this entire thing really is a shameless stunt to promote The Talk and Black Sabbath’s tour, then Sharon Osbourne should give Kelly a huge bonus, because she sicced her followers on her dad’s supposed ex-side ho and has screamed “ELDER ABUSE!”
During the course of their 33 year marriage, Ozzy’s peen apparently racked up a whole lot of frequent cheating miles by visiting tons of side pussy, but it’s his recent side ho that set Sharon off and made her dump him. Ozzy has allegedly been boning hairstylist Michelle Pugh for months. On Twatter last night, Kelly Osbourne did the social media equivalent of spray painting the words “Cum Dumpster Whore” and “Home Wrecking Pepaw Beating Hussy Slut Skeezer” onto Michelle’s car. Kelly tweeted Michelle’s number after announcing that if anybody is looking for low-lights, a blow out and a blowjob, call her up. Besides Fabio and Keith Urban, I don’t know any dude who is looking for low-lights, a blow out and a beej from the same place, but okay.
“Blow out AND a blowjob” is a great tagline for a dry (and wet) bar.
When Kelly was called out for her act of pettiness and was told that she should probably direct her rage at her dad for cheating on her mom, she told them to mind their own business, as she aired her family’s business all over Twitter.
@tldoyle1271 are you in my family? NO YOU ARE NOT YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT SHE DID! So keep ur high-mighty opinions to yourself!
— Kelly Osbourne (@KellyOsbourne) May 24, 2016
And when another person tried to enlighten Kelly to the fact that it’s not only Ozzy’s side piece’s fault, it’s also his fault, she got all very special episode of The Golden Girls by bringing elder abuse into it:
@jodee814 my father is almost 70 ever heard of elder abuse?
— Kelly Osbourne (@KellyOsbourne) May 24, 2016
I don’t know what Kelly means by “elder abuse” and I don’t know if she knows either. Does Kelly mean that Michelle tricked innocent and naive Ozzy into cheating by making him bob for Werther’s in her cooch? Or did Michelle leave a bruise on his pepaw nalgas when she spanked him while fucking? Who knows, but I do know that before Michelle changed her number, she probably got a lot of calls asking her, “Is this a full service salon and spa, like do you take facials too?”
Pic: Wenn.com