The Hoff isn’t exactly eating day old Wonder Bread and government cheese sandwiches on the floor because he can no longer afford cheeseburgers. TMZ says that thanks to that Baywatch, Knight Rider and True Survivor money, The Hoff brings in about $112,000 a month. But living like The Hoff isn’t cheap and he spends around $66,000 a month. That amount doesn’t include taxes, living expenses and the $21,000 a month he pays his ex-wife Pamela Bach. Once The Hoff is done paying everyone, he doesn’t have much money left, so he’s trying to cut off Pamela completely. Pamela is fighting him and wouldn’t you?! It’s either hassle The Hoff for that money, or get an actual job, or downgrade your Mercedes and filet mignon lifestyle to a Kia and Steak-umms lifestyle.
Ever since 63-year-old The Hoff and 52-year-old Pamela, who is also the mother of his two adult daughters, divorced in 2006, he’s been stuffing her checking account with $21,000 every month. Last month, The Hoff’s lawyers filed legal documents in court asking the judge to put an end to Pamela’s monthly spousal support. The Hoff said at the time that he wants to retire and he can’t if he has to keep paying his ex-wife. And in new court documents The Hoff’s lawyers filed, he says that he’s only got $4,000 to his name and he really needs the judge to either cut Pamela off or reduce that $21,000 a month by a lot.
The Hoff says that he’s trying hard to stay “relevant” and bring in that money, but it’s hard. His European tour ended early due to shitty ticket sales and he doesn’t know if his new reality show “Hoff The Record” (that title!) is going to bring in the money. He reportedly has a total of $1.79 million in assets, which includes houses, cars, retirement savings, art, jewelry and other stuff. Pamela is arguing that The Hoff has smeared dirt on his face and is only pretending to beg for coins. She says that he’s still richer than the Strattons. Pamela claims he’s worth at least $120 million, still works and owns houses all over the world.
Oh, Pamela…. Pamela….
She’s really going about this the wrong way. Pamela needs to argue to the court that The Hoff cannot retire, because The Hoff IS show business. The Hoff IS international entertainment. If The Hoff retires, Hollywood will crumble and Germany will collapse. The only way to make sure that The Hoff keeps entertaining the masses is if he has a reason to work and that reason is paying her $21,000 a month. In fact, Pamela should tell the court that they should double that amount so The Hoff will do even more projects. It’s not about the money! Pamela is fighting The Hoff because she wants to keep art, entertainment and the human spirit alive! Imagine a world where The Hoff isn’t acting in masterpieces like Sharknado 4? If you just imagined that world, you probably saw nothing but rubble, fire, ashes and the Four Horsemen. See!
And here’s The Hoff in London last month where he sucked the internal organs out of the body of his current fiancee Hayley Roberts, as she thought to herself, “This bitch better not be broke cause I ain’t doing this shit for free.”