Maybe it’s because I always have Waiting to Exhale on the brain, but when those pictures of Orlando Bloom snuggling up on Selena Gomez in a booth at a Las Vegas club hit the internet earlier this week, I expected Katy Perry to Instagram a video of herself in Orlando, Florida tossing a lit match onto a rental car filled with his clothes. But she didn’t do that. I’m guessing because Jeremy Scott couldn’t get the cartoon flames right on her scorned woman costume. Instead, she waited until last night and kept it vague-ish by tweeting a link to Peggy Lee’s “Is That All There Is?”
Is that all there is? https://t.co/54Q72MfXND
— KATY PERRY (@katyperry) May 12, 2016
Just for some context, the third verse of “Is That All There Is?” is about a woman who falls in love with a guy and they go on long walks and shit. And then one day he up and leaves, and she thinks she’s going to be super bummed about it, but she just sort of shrugs. For once I can say “How very subtle of you” and actually mean it. Or maybe this is just the beginning, and a Lemonade-style tell-all album called Perryer is coming later.
Selena Gomez, meanwhile, would like you to know that she has been dating, but won’t say who, because that’s personal!
Selena recently told Marie Claire:
“I’ve been dating. I’ve been having the best time. But I don’t trust anybody, so dating can only be fun if I know I’m going to have fun. I would try to promote something that I loved, and the entire interview would be about my personal life. I would leave a room feeling defeated, feeling embarrassed, but I would always make sure to put that smile on my face because I wasn’t going to let them get to me.”
Even if Selena finds someone she can trust, there’s still everyone else who is willing to blow their cover. TMZ recently got their hands on a video of Selena and Orlando sneaking out of that club together after their canoodle session and getting into the same vehicle. Once again, a source maintains that they absolutely weren’t driving to a hotel to bone; they were simply going to get fast foods with friends. Uh huh. Lemme guess, they had a little “In-N-Out” with a side of “animal style“? No really, did they go to In-N-Out? Jealous.