Hot Slut Of The Day!

May 8, 2016 / Posted by:

The stunningly exquisite pasta shell gold jewelry box that some of us made as kids for our mother! 

When I was in the second or third grade, we made gorgeous, handmade and one-of-a-kind jooree boxes for our moms for Mother’s Day. My mom has a heart made of pure gold, so she used the pasta shell jewelry box I gave her for years. She might still use it. I haven’t seen the one that I made for my mom in years, but I’m assuming that in her bathroom is a secret door that leads to a secret room where she keeps all of the precious craft shit that my sister and I made for her as kids behind museum-grade plexiglass. In my head, the pasta shell jewelry box I made for my mom looks like the one above, but in reality, it probably looks more like this:

macaronjewelryboxmothersday

To make those opulent boxes of sparkly wonder, we used cigar boxes, pasta, gold spray paint and regular paint. Our teacher wouldn’t let us spray paint the boxes ourselves, but she let us watch while she did it outside. Those were the days when your teacher would let you inhale spray paint fumes as she glamourized the gorgeous craft project you made for your mom.

My mom’s out of town right now or else I’d whip up another pasta shell gold jewelry box and give it to her for old time’s sake, just so I can hear her say, “Err, why is this empty inside? You know giving me crap like this is only cute when you’re a jobless child. Now take me to IHOP already!

Happy Mother’s Day!

Pics: Worth100, OBC

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