If Marge Simpson Went Goth And Lost Her Brows In A Meth Lab Explosion…..

May 3, 2016 / Posted by:

And I didn’t know that Backdoor Farrah got a job as a reporter (no offense to that reporter in the bronze sequined top thing in the back).

Anna Wintour and the other foolery providers of the Met Gala should just declare that every year’s theme is LOOK AT ME LOOK AT ME GOD LOOK AT ME. Because every year, one part of them tries to dress the theme, another part doesn’t even try and the others throw on some fucked-up shit and add a touch of something that goes with the theme. Katy Perry fell into the latter category. Last night, she answered the question, “What would it look like if Halle Berry’s character from B*A*P*S bleached her skin and starred as the Evil Queen in a low-budget straight-to-the-99-cent-section-of-the-iTunes-store reboot of Snow White and The Huntsman?

Katy Perry’s Hunger Games funeral dress was by Prada and her black No. 2 pencil eraser hair was by Dixon Ticonderoga. I’m going to take a wild guess and say that Katy hid razors in her wig and wanted all of those keys on her dress just in case she needed a weapon to shank a trick with if Taylor Swift’s Easy Bake Oven Brigade tried to jump her ass in theĀ girls room.

The technology part of Katy’s ensemble was a Tamagotchi and her current piece Orlando Bloom also wore one on his tuxedo jacket pocket:

tamagotchikatyorlando

Yup, that’s pretty much how you win the theme. And Orlando Bloom’s Tamagotchi took a shit on the red carpet. If that was his Tamagotchi’s official review for most of the looks on the carpet, I agree!

Pics: Wenn.com, Splash

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