Last night was the White House Correspondents’ Dinner. President Obama actually made the room, and me, laugh. Larry Wilmore didn’t. Donald Trump was a no show. And there were tons, TONS, of celebrities (and celebrity-adjacents) there. Celebrities love nothing more than being invited to fancy political things because, I imagine, they feel it makes them legitimate. “Well! Mr President Barack Obama thought I was worth his time,” I see some TV actress saying when doors get shut in her face at auditions for shows at about teens played by people in their late-30s. So let’s get down to who was there and what they wore.
The biggest star of the night, obviously, duh, was Gary Fisher! Yes, Gary Fisher graced the red carpet and the President with his presence. And unlike that rude little baby, Prince George, he was not in a bathrobe. He was accompanied by his life partner, Carrie Fisher, and, for some most likely Tumblr related reason, Tom Hiddleston.
Helen Mirren, who President Obama, later in the night called “awesome“, came with a temporary Prince tattoo and a purple dress. Leave it Helen, The Queen, to make a night about the President into a night about a Prince.
Some of the ladies of The View were there, sadly, sans Whoopi. I’m really enjoying Joy Behar’s outfit. Nothing screams elegant night to me like rehearsal blacks. Taking second place in this photo is Raven Symone in her Diane Keaton drag.
Gabrielle Union, of cinematic masterpiece Bring It On, was also there. Judging by her face and her arms and hands, she came thinking that this was some sort of audition for a sequel to Mannequin, which I’ll call, First Lady Mannequin. That’s the only logical explanation for what she’s doing.
Noted Atlantean and, according to her, rich bitch, Nene Leakes was there too. I’m not going to question how rich she is because that’s not for me to do. I’ll let that Party City table runner skirt she’s wearing do the talking on that subject.
Kendall Jenner was there, obviously, because does an event really happen if there isn’t at least one Kardashian there whoring it up for the cameras? She worked it hard to try and look classy but ended up looking more like the evening version of Bordello Barbie. Pretty klassy for her and her team, though!
Now for a palate cleanser… Queen Aretha was there! Hopefully she gave that young hussy a talking to. But who are we kidding? Someone as powerful and wise as Aretha probably doesn’t even register thirsty hos like Kendall and her krew.
And here’s more famous and sort-of-famous types who were there last night: