Rachel Roy Isn’t “Becky With The Good Hair,” But Rita FameWhora Wants Everyone To Think She Is
Today, Rachel Roy burped up a statement to People where she denied being the “Becky with the good hair” that Beyonce sang about on Lemonade, and she also shit on the rumors that Jay-Z’s roving peen made its way into her bull dozer vagina. So, now that Rachel Roy is done getting attention for that dumb “Becky with the good hair” crap, it’s some other trick’s turn to use that lyric to get people to look at her. Enter the High Priestess of Trying It: Rita Ora!
The hardcore members of the Beyhive probably had to call in sick again today (although, taking a “mental health day” would’ve beeen more appropriate), because they need to focus on hitting their queen’s enemies with an emoji attack. The emoji really is mightier than the sword. Rita Ora is the Beyhive’s #1 enemy again after she poked at the hive by making it look like she’s “Becky with the good hair.” Since Rita doesn’t really get attention for her music anymore, she decided to try to get attention for being someone’s side ho.
Yesterday, Rita threw a rock at the hive when she Snapchatted a video of her wearing a lemon bra. Internet detectives also noticed that Rita’s “R” necklace looked like a “J.” Double shots fired!
Rita threw another rock at the hive when she hit the ho stroll yesterday while wearing the same ugly $3,300 Gucci ensemble that Beyonce wore in the video for Formation (see: pics below). And Rita seemed to keep throwing shit at the Beyhive by posting the poster for Ash Wednesday on Instagram. Ash Wednesday is a movie about a woman (Elizabeth Taylor) who gets plastic surgery to save her marriage.
Rita is currently suing Jay Z’s company Roc Nation because she thinks they are ignoring her and she wants out of her contract. So some think she’s pulling some STUNT QUEEN moves to get back at Jay. But please, Rita, Jay Z and Beyonce probably came up with this plan together in the den of the Illuminati lair. This stunt works for everyone involved. Rita’s never-ending thirsty ass gets some attention and Beyonce’s album Limonati gets even more attention.
Once Rita’s stunt show is done, it’ll be someone else’s turn to be “Becky with the good hair” to keep everyone talking about Lemonade. My guess is that someone will be Goopy Paltrow and she’ll hit the stroll wearing a $95,000 solid gold and red diamond “Hello My Name Is Becky” broach (sold exclusively at GOOP). But Goopy’s going to be really disappointed and will end up calling Jay Z to say, “Hey, boo, you told me that Bey’s stans were going to sting the shit out of me. I thought you meant that literally! I canceled my bee stinging appointment and everything.”
UPDATE: That was fast. Rita already denied being “Becky.”
Pics: Splash