Normally when someone wears a giant-ass diamond on that finger, it usually means one of two things:
1. They hit the gold-digger lottery by getting married to the kind of richie who can afford a giant-ass diamond
2. They demand a life of sparkly 15-carat glamour at all times, regardless of their relationship situation, and they had to slip it on their ring finger because they starting to run out of room on their other fingers
But sometimes people throw a huge engagement-looking ring on that finger because they just want some attention. And it sounds like we can go ahead and throw Nicki Minaj in that third category.
Almost a year ago, Nicki Instagrammed a picture of her left hand showing off a massive yellow diamond ring on her ring finger. She wouldn’t confirm whether or not her boyfriend of three months (at the time), Meek Mill, had popped the question and asked her to be Mrs. Mill. Then in December, she Instagrammed a picture of that finger working another engagement-looking diamond ring with the caption: “Now this is what I’m talking about baby.”
As of March, Nicki was playing vague about whether or not the diamond rings on her hand were engagement rings. Nicki told Nylon that her third ring would be her engagement ring, but she also said Meek referred to her as his “fiance.” Well, Nicki was asked about her maybe-engagement rings by Ellen DeGeneres on a recently taped episode of Ellen. Nicki maintains that, despite the fact that both rings look like something that was pulled out of a pocket by a dude on one knee on the Maid of the Mist boat ride at Niagara Falls, they’re not engagement rings. In fact, Nicki doesn’t even want to say she’s in a relationship with the guy who keeps slipping $500,000 rings on her finger.
You know you’re good at what you do when you can get two expensive diamond not-engagement rings (with a third actual engagement ring on the way) from a guy you casually refer to in public as “a boy who likes me.” Nicki Minaj just became my new #getjewelry hero.
If Nicki does end up getting a third and final ring from Meek Mill, I cannot wait to see what it looks like. Nicki’s first two sort-of engagement rings hit all the 5 Cs of my diamond grading system: classy, crudely expensive, comically large, carpal tunnel-causing, and coruscating to the point of near-blindness. Obviously if Meek wants to go above and beyond on this next ring, his smartest option would be to have one of those 20lb diamond paperweights from AliExpress set into a reinforced platinum-plated steel band.
Here’s Nicki “I’m single” Minaj at the premiere of Barbershop: The Next Cut last night. If Li’l Kim still considers Nicki Minaj to be the Gaga to her Madonna, she’s going to be super pissed when she sees these pictures of the bottom of Nicki’s left tit peeking out to say hello.