Dear HBO: Please Let Emilia Clarke Write An Episode Of “Game Of Thrones”

April 5, 2016 / Posted by:

Never has an accidental hand shadow looked so appropriate. And yes, I know that the fingers make it look like there’s two dicks. But when you’re desperate for television dick, you’ll take whatever weird shit you can get.

During a recent interview with Amy Schumer’s current favorite magazine, Glamour, Emilia Clarke – aka Daenerys Targaryen (aka The Blonde Dragon Lady for those who don’t watch Game of Thrones) secured herself a place in the hearts of Michael K and everyone else who wants to see more penis on TV. Glamour asked Emilia what story line she’d love to see happen on Game of Thrones. Thankfully, Emilia knows what people want: DICKS. Someone tell Amanda Peet’s husband to grab a pen and write this down, because it’s important.

“I want to see Daenerys and her three dragons share the throne. Eat goat they’ve barbecued. And bring back all the pretty boys, get them to take their trousers down, and be like, ‘I’m now the queen of everything! I’d like close-ups of all the boys’ penises, please.'”

For those of you furiously constructing a time machine so that you can go back and convince Emilia to write an episode where we see Jason Momoa’s dick before his character, Khal Drogo (SPOILERS) dies, you can stop. According to Emilia, her former TV husband’s dick is so glorious, the mere sight of it could trigger a nationwide Zoloft shortage. Yes, she spoke once again about his sock-covered penis.

“I saw his member, but it was covered in a pink fluffy sock. Showing it would make people feel bad. It’s too fabulous.”

As you can see from the picture above, there are plenty of asses on GoT to look at, and sometimes they show the odd dick. I don’t even care when they’re attached to a dude in a busted bathrobe, a TV dick is a dick. So obviously, I’m Team Give-Emilia-A-Script-And-Let-Her-Go-To-Town. I would also appreciate if Emilia could elaborate on that penis sock. She’s mentioned it twice now, and yet we know so little about it. Like, how big was the sock? Are we talking ankle or mid-calf? Who cares about whether Jon Snow is alive or not; we need to know more about Khal Drogo’s sock-covered junk!

Pic: HBO

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