Hot Slut Of The Day!

March 26, 2016 / Posted by:

Birdie Sanders!

That Bernie Sanders is good. While talking at a rally in Portland, Oregon yesterday, he put an actual bird on it. Bernie was talking to the people about boring political shit when everyone’s attention went off of him and onto a tiny bird friend who flew over to him like he’s Snow White. What a natural, organic and not-at-all staged moment that only happened because one of his staffers sprinkled bird seed all over the podium and stage.

But still, it was a magical moment and I wanted the bird to hop onto Bernie’s shoulder as he sang “Once Upon a Dream” as little squirrels, mice and other birds hopped onto the stage to make him a gorgeous gown for the Inaugural Ball. Birdie Sanders instantly became a Twitter star and #BirdieSanders was trending forever. This whole mess of an election really is for the birds!

If you didn’t watch that video, Bernie says that he believes Birdie Sanders is a SIGN!

“I think there may be some symbolism here. I know it doesn’t look like it, but that bird is really a dove asking us for world peace. No more wars.”

If bald eagles didn’t hate Jabba the Trump and want to eat the road kill on his head, he probably could have trained one of them to swoop down and eat Birdie Sanders while wearing a “Make America Great Again” trucker hat. I’m sure Hillary Clinton will respond to this by tweeting a selfie with Big Bird, Toucan Sam, Tweety Bird, Donald Duck and all of the Angry Birds after getting their endorsement.

But really, I think Bernie found his running mate if he gets the nomination. Bernie/Birdie 2016! The quickest way to make America great again is to put a bird on it!

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