Three Words: OH GOD YES!

March 22, 2016 / Posted by:

The bad news is that if mutated Boglin Donald Trump wins the GOP presidential nomination, he won’t choose Sarah Palin as his VP. The good news is that Trump won’t pick Sarah, because she’ll probably be too busy trying to be a TV star again.

People says that the current baddest freestyle rapper in the game has signed a deal with production company Warm Springs to do a syndicated court show like Judge Judy. Sarah Palin may become Judge Mama Grizzly! The show doesn’t have a name yet (SPOILER ALERT: They’re going to call it “I Can See Your Guilt From My House“) and no stations have picked it up yet (SPOILER ALERT: Wasilla Public Access is going to buy the exclusive rights to it), but the plan is to shoot a pilot where Judge Mama Grizzly spits out nonsense from her salad spinner of a mouth while presiding over cases. No, Sarah Palin doesn’t have a law degree, but I’m sure she has an online certificate in Keeping It Real from the Community College of Hard Knocks and that’s all that matters.

Warm Springs has already put together a team that includes an executive from Judge Judy and Judge Joe Brown. The source also dribbled about this stream of messiness:

“It’s a production deal. What happens next is she’ll meet with stations, make a pilot and sell it. Palin’s telegenic personality, wide appeal and common sense wisdom make her a natural for this kind of format and she was Warm Springs’ top pick for this project.”

Are they hiring writers yet? Because to write Sarah Palin’s lines for her, all you have to do is take a lot of pain killers, get drunk, pull all the pages out of a “word of the day” desk calendar and then randomly arrange them in sentences. That’s pretty much the technique I use to write my Dlisted posts. And Sarah Palin doing a court show is like Dr. Jenny McCarthy and Dr. Kristin Cavawhatever doing a medical advice show. I can’t wait!

Pic: Splash

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