On Friday night, Hulk Hogan probably celebrated his $115 million victory against Gawker Media by prematurely ordering a half dozen diamond-encrusted gold-woven silk bandanas. Well, he can order a couple more, because the jury in his secret fuck tape lawsuit against Gawker decided today he should get ANOTHER $25 million. I don’t know if the overdone chicharrón is going to see much of that insane amount of cash, but if he does, then we should brace our eardrums because he’ll probably try to make Brooke Hogan a pop star again.
Gawker was already pinned down hard by Hulk Hogan when the jury awarded him $60 million for emotional distress and $55 million for money he lost from getting dropped by the WWE. (They dropped his ass, because his b-hole slit of a mouth shits out the n-word in the sex tape.) The jury came back today to start figuring out punitive damages, and TMZ seemed to think that they’d give Hulk another $200 million to $300 million. That didn’t happen. They decided that Gawker should pay $25 million in punitive damages. Out of that $25 million, $10 million must personally come from Gawker founder Nick Denton’s bank accounts, and A.J. Daulerio, the editor who posted the sex tape, must pay $100,000. Gawker’s lawyers said in court today that A.J. doesn’t have any assets and is $27,000 in the hole thanks to those goddamn life-sucking leeches known as student loans. Gawker’s lawyers also said that the company is currently valued at around $85 million. To put that number into perspective, Dumb Trash Enterprises (Dlisted’s parent company) is currently valued at the price of a used condom and a bag of weed that’s actually oregano.
Gawker has already said that they’re going to appeal this shit and believe they’ll eventually win out in appeals court. They still, however, have to put up a $50 million bond if they want to appeal. Meanwhile, Hulk Hogan’s ex-wife Linda Hogan told Inside Edition (via People) that the verdict gave her the sicks:
“It made me a little bit sick. I don’t know how he can sleep at night getting that money for doing what he did in a roundabout way. It’s dirty money. [The verdict] is kind of like saying he is being rewarded for bad behavior.”
Well, if Hulk does get his paws on any of that money, it will be literally dirty thanks to his self-tanner ridden hands. But I totally believe that Linda got the wet heaves when she found out. She probably thought to herself, “Ugh, I sucked on that barbecued circus peanut peen for years and I’m not gonna get a goddamn cent of that money. I’ll have to settle for a measly check that Inside Edition will give me for saying how disgusted I am.”