Gwen Stefani Might Be A Zombie

March 19, 2016 / Posted by:

There is dark magic in this world. Magic one must never toy with. Just ask Mauro Oliveira. He’ll tell you all about the evil witch Boreza. Today’s treacherous journey into the dark arts heads straight into The Serpent and the Rainbow territory. We’re talking zombies. Some possibly voodoo shit. Gwen Stefani is out pushing her new album, This Is What The Truth Feels Like, and she’s dropping some not so subtle hints that she may in fact be undead. Earlier in the week, USA Today necromanced an interview with her about no good, sass-a-frassin’ Gavin Rossdale and the main quote from it is what brings us to this strange and dark land:

 “I was dead. I was literally dead, like panicking – like anyone would be.”

She looks different in the face lately, so I can believe she crossed over and came back. That explains it. Heartbreak will do that to a person. Going even further to prove that she may or may not be a zombie now, in a clip from a CBS (via Us) interview that airs tomorrow, she says:

“I had no skin, it was so raw, you know what I mean? And nobody knew what was happening and I had this big secret.”

I’d find it hard to keep it a secret I was dead and/or a zombie too, but for a dead chick with raw skin, she looks pretty damn good. She went on tell USA Today just how much being selfless and giving back via The Voice helped her through the pain and back into the realm of the living (the money must’ve helped too, just a little):

“I’m gonna have to believe this is happening because I’m supposed to do this and help people in some way. It’s a small thing, in a way, but music is so powerful it really does help people. It was the first time in my career that I did something that was on the outside of being all about me, you know what I mean? [It feels] very motherly to be a coach, to be able to look back at what I [have] done. It kind of brought back my confidence. How do you compete with your own self after a while? I think by being on The Voice and being around all that music and all these people experiencing things that I’d already experienced for the first time, being able to look back and dig through all the stuff I’ve done, [made] me feel renewed.”

She doesn’t stop there. She plays the down in the dumps but the people, my fans and music saved me card just as hard for CBS:

“During that time period, I felt like, I was down all the way. Like you don’t go down lower than that. It was rock bottom. I was so embarrassed, you know what I mean? I was like, ‘Wow, I can’t. I have to turn this into something. I can’t go down like this. Like, if I can do music, then maybe just everything will be OK.”

I’m glad she’s back to making music, zombie or not. I’ve listened to the album a whole lot since it came out yesterday and I’m sticking to it being good. The difference between this album and the last one No Doubt released could also be evidence that she died and came back because they are living and unliving worlds apart. Could this mean she’s going to bring out her L.A.M.B. posse from her archives closet and zombify them?

Here she is at LAX coming back from Japan with hair that shows the darkness slowly taking over:

Pics: Splash

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