So much for Madge supposedly raising the white flag and letting Rocco Ritchie live in London with his dad. Rocco and Guy Ritchie were in a London court room today to continue the train wreck custody fight against Mage. Nothing really happened. Madge wasn’t there, because she’s spreading her Rebel Heart world tour through Australia. And tonight (which already happened in Australia), she spread the sad clown emotions during a special one-night-only show for 1,500 fans in Melbourne.
The free, invite-only show was supposed to start at 10:30, but it didn’t start until almost 1 in the goddamn morning, because it took Madge a long time to do herself up like Edith Piaf if Edith Piaf went to a clown-themed rave wearing clothes and a wig she found in a cardboard box marked “give to Goodwill” outside of Nicki Minaj’s house. In the show titled Tears of a Clown (working title: Fuck The Cunt That Is Guy Ritchie), Madge warbled out a lot of ballads and songs she really doesn’t perform live. She rode around on a tricycle and of course, she brought the raw sadness in front of a giant picture of Rocco even though Rocco apparently wants her to stop doing that.
Madge opened with Send In The Clowns from A Little Night Music, and a clip of it ended up on YouTube. I was completely ready to hate all of it, and for the first few seconds I did, but then I started to love it all. I mean, it’s so damn weird and a mess. Madge yodeling out a show tune and flashing her nalgas while dressed up like a sad, slutty clown. It’s like something you’d see at Baby Jane’s lounge show in the basement of a club in the San Fernando Valley somewhere. It’s HIGH ART!
Madge is back!
And before you press play on that video, you may want to send in the ear plugs.