Unless your only exposure to Chris Rock is the Madagascar movies or a television from the 90s that plays nothing but those Lil Penny commercials, then you pretty much expected Chris Rock to drag the Oscars for their lack of diversity this year. And he did! For all 10:28 minutes of his monologue, Chris Rock was like a one-man #OscarsSoWhite Twitter thread.
Chris yanked at the weaves of the Academy by making a joke about there being “at least 15 black people” in the opening montage, referring to the Oscars as the “White People’s Choice Awards“, and slapping at Hollywood for being “sorority racist.” Yes, Chris went there. And then once he got there, he took a cab from there and went even further by joking that the In Memoriam segment was going to be just black people who were shot by the cops on their way to the movies.
But because Chris is an equal-opportunity hater, he took a few swipes at the famous types who told him he should cancel his tuxedo rental and boycott the ceremony. Chris also shot up to the top of Scientology’s Shit List by reading Oscar boycotter Jada Pinkett Smith to filth. Marty’s clap back at Gloria happens at the 2:48 mark.
In the event that gets yanked from YouTube, you can watch the whole thing here.
According to Chris, “Jada boycotting the Oscars is like me boycotting Rihanna’s panties. I wasn’t invited!” Somewhere in an ear-nose-and-throat clinic, the Original Aunt Viv is being treated for extensive damage done to her vocal cords from screaming “YAAASSSSS!” at the top of her lungs.
Chris kept it real, and I’m sure there were some people who weren’t having it. But it never really went into uncomfortable-for-everyone territory. Then again, you’ve got to work pretty hard to beat John Travolta creeping on everyone during last year’s ceremony.
Here’s Chris and his mom and his new girlfriend at the Vanity Fair party last night.