Somewhere In The World, Kristen Stewart Is Wishing She Could Be Dancing

February 18, 2016 / Posted by:

Seen above looking little a sullen Little Bo Beep as a go-go dancer at a goth club, Kristen Stewart talked to AnOther Magazine about fame, fucking up and how she really just wishes she was Billy Elliot on molly. If she was, she’d be dancing and twirling all the time. Here’s a few quotes:

On how she really just wants to fucking dance: “I wish I could dance like nobody was watching. I danced the other night and it felt so fuckin’ good. And it’s so not like me. I envy people like that so much. I’m pretty physical, but I really need to let myself go. Honestly, I just wish I could fuckin’ dance more. That’s all.”

On how she’s a fuck-up (and on another note, I don’t know about you, but she sounds like Jerry Maguire on a whole lot coke here): “I fuck up a lot. But it never stops. The work never stops. ‘One more time with feeling. Do it again, do it again. Oh, you think you fucked up? You don’t think that was good enough? Sweet, do it again, do it again, do it again.’”

On people in entertainment getting rich on bullshit distractions: “People who are interested in selling a life as if it’s a comic book story? It’s just money, money, money, money. It’s just bullshit distraction, and a lot of people make a lot of money on that, because we wanna get distracted.”

That last one…. I don’t know if she’s talking about tabloids or if she’s talking about famous tricks who sell out their personal lives for money and publicity. You know, unlike her and Robert Pattinson who were only together because their love was genuine and pure and not at all because publicists knew that them being a thing was good for the Twilight movies and for business.

But seriously, aren’t a lot of things in entertainment a distraction that allows us to escape from the daily horrors of real-life? Tabloids are a distraction, many movies are a distraction, and you reading this dumb shit about KStew is distracting you from folding the damn laundry. Everything is a distraction! Actually, that’s not true. I can’t say that about Twatlight, the movies that made her really rich even though she did about as much as an animatronic character at Chuck E. Cheese does. The Twilight movies aren’t a distraction. They are the opposite. They are real and show us the harsh reality of what happens when you fall in love with a sparkly vampire who won’t fuck you and has to protect you from other vampires trying to kill you. Those movies are PSAs! I really hope that Kristen Stewart didn’t have to pay taxes on all the money, money, money, money she made from those movies, because she did an important service to us all.

Pics: AnOther

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