This isn’t the feud any of us saw coming, but it’s the feud we needed.
Rapper B.o.B (government name: Bobby Ray Simmons, Jr.) dropped a whole lot of TRUTH onto the eyeballs of his millions of Twitter followers over the weekend when he went on and on and on and on and on about how the Earth is flat and we’ve all been lied to. B.o.B’s flat Earth sermon got so much attention that Harvard-educated astrophysicist Neil deGrasse Tyson stepped in, sat B.o.B down at a desk in the front of the classroom and tried to burst a trick’s flat bubble by telling him that the planet is round. But B.o.B isn’t going to listen to some professional planet studier who has spent years studying and teaching this sort of thing. B.o.B knows that Neil deGrasse Tyson is being paid by the government to push the round Earth lie. B.o.B sees you, NDT!
I swear, B.o.B arguing with an astrophysicist about the planet being flat is like me arguing with David Foster Wallace about gramur. speling and, sentuns strucksher.
B.o.B really gave it to NDT by releasing a diss track called “Flatline,” which also describes the current state of his career, which is why he has to do shit like this to promote himself. The diss track is below. I’m sure all high school science teachers will replace their textbooks with it:
If you didn’t listen to that truth bomb, here’s a piece of the lyrics:
I see only good things on the horizon
That’s probably why the horizon is always rising
Indoctrinated in a cult called science
And graduated to a club full of liars
Heliocentrism, you were the sixth victim
Fuck you and your team, you could sit on the bench with ’em
They nervous, but before you try to curve it
Do your research on David Irving
Stalin was way worse than Hitler
That’s why the POTUS gotta wear a kippah
I’m a man first ‘fore an artist
Get a lawyer, look up Doctor Richard Sauder