So Uncle Terry Had A Baby Shower….

January 12, 2016 / Posted by:

You may have thought that Uncle Terry becoming an actual father to baby twins was just some kind of horrifying news your brain conjured up during a fever dream, but nope. It’s happening for real. Uncle Terry’s girlfriend/former assistant Alexandra “Skinny” Bolotow is carrying their twins in her womb and to celebrate becoming Child Protective Services’ most visited family in a few months, they threw a baby shower. And it was a very Uncle Terry baby shower. The only thing missing was Miley Cyrus giving Uncle Terry a lap dance while dressed up in that terrifying slutty baby costume.

Uncle Terry and Skinny gave out condoms with her ultrasound scan on them, peen lollipops and dick glasses. It looked more like John Travolta’s birthday party than a baby shower. I don’t even want to know what game they played instead of the candy bar diaper game. Okay, I just took a guess in my head and now I want to remove my brain from my skull and soak it in ammonia. Three pictures from Uncle Terry’s baby shower are after the jump. TIP: Pull out a gallon-sized jug of brain bleach before you get to the cake:

Here are the centerpieces centerpenises:

🎈🎉🍭

A photo posted by Terry Richardson (@terryrichardson) on

Here are the condoms (which Uncle Terry should use more of) they gave out:

💦💦💦

A photo posted by Terry Richardson (@terryrichardson) on

And here’s the CAKE FROM HELL:

Such a fun baby shower yesterday! We were so touched by all the love and good vibes (and this great cake!) 👶🏻🍰👶🏻

A photo posted by Terry Richardson (@terryrichardson) on

Some church really needs to make and sell holy water eye drops, because I’d use a whole bottle after seeing those tiny Uncle Terry heads coming out of a fondant cooch. Well, the good news is that Uncle Terry didn’t cum all over that cake. Wait, what is the filling made of?

Pic: Splash

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