Hot Slut Of The Day!

December 31, 2015 / Posted by:

The hoverboarding holy chanteuse from the Philippines!

When I was a kid, my abuelita would drag me to Christmas Eve mass at her Catholic church and it was at one of those masses where I learned the important skill of sleeping with my eyes open. Shit was boring. What those Christmas Eve masses really needed was a yodeling priest on wheels.

During Christmas Eve mass at Our Lady of Miraculous Medal Parish in Biñan, Rev. Albert San Jose entertained the people by singing a Christmas song while gliding down the aisle in a two-wheeled, lit-up skateboard that everyone insist on calling a hoverboard. The people at the mass loved it and the video of the priest bringing some drama to mass has gotten over 14 million likes on Facebook so far. But not everyone is into it. The hoverboarding priest’s boss, The Diocese of San Pablo, seem to think that one of those likes didn’t come from Jesus, because singing on a convertible Segway is an disrespectful act against God!

 The Guardian says that the Diocese of San Pablo suspended Rev. Albert and released a statement where they threw holy water at his ass for being so disrespecting the church. So yeah, when it comes to child touching, the Catholic church is like, “err, nothing to see her, move along,” but when it comes to a priest singing on a death trap, they’re like, “SANTO DIOS! Condemn his ass!” Here’s the statement from the Diocese of San Pablo:

Last December 24, 2015, before the final blessing of the Christmas eve mass, as a way of greeting his parishioners, the priest sang a Christmas song, while going around the nave standing on a hoverboard.

That was wrong.

The Eucharist demands utmost respect and reverence. It is the Memorial of the Lord’s Sacrifice. It is the source and summit of Christian life. It is the Church’s highest form of worship. Consequently, it is not a personal celebration where one can capriciously introduce something to get the attention of the people.

The priest said that it was a wake up call for him; he acknowledged that his action was not right and promised that it will not happen again.

He will be out of the parish and will spend some time to reflect on this past event.

He would like to apologize for what happened.

While he’s reflecting on the dark-sided skid mark of embarrassment that he rolled all over the Catholic church, I hope that Jesus whispers in his ear, “They see you rollin’, they hatin’,” and he decides to take his act to Las Vegas where this kind of showmanship really belongs!

And honestly, if hoverboards were around during Jesus time, he’d probably roll around on one of those instead of doing that whole “walk on water” thing.

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