We all know that Noel Gallagher is a human ray of sunshine who only has good and sweet things to say, so it’s totally out of character for him to hate on a trick. But while talking about his upcoming tour in Australia with Music Feed (via Billboard), the crusty cunt pimple shit on Adele’s music and said he doesn’t understand why everyone creams themselves dry over her. Earlier in the interview, Noel said that the state of modern music today is a “sea of cheese.” (“Sea of cheese” is also how Noel’s wife describes his dick situation, I’m guessing.) The interviewer brought up his “sea of cheese” comment and said that thanks to phrases like that, he’s earned a reputation as a bona fide shit talking machine. Noel was asked if he feels like journalists try to pull a bitchy gem out of him, because they know he’ll deliver…and he did just that with his answer.
If I get asked a question on anything, I give a straight answer. It is interesting that no-one ever talks about my love of U2 and Coldplay, but there you go. Lately, the one I’ve been asked about is Adele. If someone wants to know what I think of Adele, I’ll fucking tell them. Not because I have any sort of agenda or because I’m trying to whip up any kind of hysteria. I just don’t see what all the fuss is about. I don’t like her music. I think it’s music for fucking grannies.
The way I was brought up, you’re obliged to give an honest answer if someone asks you an honest question. If you trot out the same bullshit all the time, then you’re one of them. And I’m not one of them. I’m one of us.
The interviewer should’ve asked Noel’s bitter ass what exactly he means by “fucking grannies.” Does he mean that Adele makes granny music or does he mean that “Hello” is the perfect song to blast while you’re pile driving a granny? Because there’s a difference.
I don’t always agree with Noel Gallagher, but I always appreciate how he stays hating. He is a hero to us hating assholes, and not only that, but he’s pretty funny too. I mean, he thinks Adele’s music is boring, but yet he loves the Ambien-stylings of Coldplay? Oh, Noel, you so funny. He was telling a joke, right?