Finally! Someone is trying to put an end to the struggles of a stage fright bladder. Most of us dudes have been there. You’re in a crowded bathroom and when you finally get up to the urinal, your dick becomes Little Voice and it cannot perform. The pressure felt from the dudes impatiently waiting behind you mixed with the silence of the bathroom gets to you and nothing comes out. You begin to push so hard that a fart bubble forms in your ass and suddenly you have to hold in a butt burp while trying to pee at the same time. It’s a true test of will! Holding in a fart while trying to piss in a crowded bathroom should be a challenge on Survivor. You finally give up and take your blue ball bladder out of there. Well, a genius inventor wants to put an end to that problem.
The bathroom retailer site Plumbworld tells HuffPo (via WOW Report) that their studies show that 30 percent of guys surveyed got pee shy when trying to empty their bladder at a urinal in a crowded bathroom and another 75 percent said they would rather use a toilet in a stall. So, Plumbworld came up with a magical cape with attached suction cups that stick to the wall and transports you to a golden shower paradise where you can piss like no one’s watching.
This device, not yet commercially released, is designed to help men hide their goodies as they do their business.
Online bathroom retailer Plumbworld unveiled the Privi-Pee prototype after a company survey reflected the anxiety some have over public toilets.
However, if these images look strange to you, please note that this device is still in its planning stages. And while many people agree that bathroom anxiety can be a serious issue, the company is not ruling out selling this product as a novelty item, too.
“We’re not sure when we’ll sell them yet, but we’re thinking about it being some sort of funny novelty product,” Thomas Mulrooney, a Plumbworld marketing assistant, told The Huffington Post via email.
To use the Privi-Pee, a man must fasten the cape-like cover under his neck as he stands above the urinal. Suction cups at the end of the fabric adhere to the wall, creating a confined private space.
The device fits inside a backpack.
But as the CEO of the International Paruresis Association (I didn’t make that up) points out to HuffPo, the piss cape may make it even harder to pee. It will drawn even more attention to you. Also, if the piss cape becomes a thing and everyone knows what it is, you’ll feel even more pressure to get your crotch faucet working immediately. Everyone will expect you to pee right away since you’re wearing a piss wizard cape. Yeah, I’m not sure it’s the cure for a shy bladder, but I can think of a different use for it….
You know when you’re sucking a dick in an alley and you just can’t get into it because you’re a demure flower who is afraid that someone will walk by and see you? With a little retooling this cape will be the answer to your problem! All your dude has to do is put this cape on and stick it to the wall behind you and voila! It becomes an instant private dick sucking booth. That cape may not be a dream come true for shy pissers, but it is a dream come true for shy dick suckers.