Pamela Anderson’s Naked Body Will Be One Of The Last Naked Bodies In Playboy

December 3, 2015 / Posted by:

This is obligatory: CHARO WAS ROBBED!

Playboy announced two months ago that the end of a Photoshopped lady crotch era was upon us, because they made the decision to stop putting naked chicks in their magazine. The January/February 2016 issue of Playboy will be the last issue that will give eyeballs a serving of twat that’s been Photoshopped so much it looks like a silicone mini oven mitt. Of course, since Pamela Anderson’s naked body has been inside of Playboy the most times (14 covers and 15 spreads), they asked her to be on the cover of the final all-nudie issue. 48-year-old Pamela tells Entertainment Tonight that Hugh Hefner’s lawyer called her and said that there’s only one beauty they want for the cover and it’s Charo, but since Charo said no, they were willing to settle for her ass.

The Canadian-American rose (who is giving me porn parody Harley Quinn on that cover) said a while ago that her sons were teased in school because their mom’s nipples and poon are all over the Internet. So she asked them if she should do Playboy again. Her sons, 19-year-old Brandon and 17-year-old Dylan, both told her to do it:

“I said, ‘Hef just called, he wants me to do the last cover of Playboy,’ and [Brandon] goes, ‘Mom you’ve got to do it. We’re older, we’re not embarrassed anymore of you. You know, we think you’re great.’ He was so excited. He may have high-fived me!

And then I asked Dylan too, and Dylan’s like, ‘Mom, you know you’ve done it all.’ I don’t know what to say but they were really excited for me, and I was excited too.”

I love Dylan’s response. It’s like he shrugged and said, “The entire world has seen dad’s dick go into your vagina, so what’s another few pictures of your naked body?”

The pictures were taken by Ellen von Unwerth and the interview was done by actor/performance artist/journalist/author/director/mind of our generation James Franco.

Playboy wouldn’t be Playboy if they didn’t Photoshop Pamela’s new pictures to infinity and beyond, but while they were at it, they should’ve added a few sparkles of life in Hugh Hefner’s eyes. He kind of looks like a taxidermied turtle. Although, maybe “the pimp tortoise and the trampy hare” is what they were going for in that picture. Art!

Pics: Ellen von Unwerth/Playboy

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