The day after Thanksgiving, Jennifer Aniston’s Lonely Sadling Starter Kit (containing Adele’s new CD, a membership to Rent-A-Cat, a boyfriend pillow, 3 logs of uncooked cookie dough and Aveeno tear wipes) probably showed up on Courteney Cox’s doorstep, because she has broken up with her dude of 2 years.
Courteney and Johnny McDaid of the band Snow Patrol got engaged in June 2014 after dating for 6 months of dating. People says that Johnny isn’t going to become Courteney’s second husband, because they quit each other right before Thanksgiving. Johnny already moved all of his shit out of Courteney’s houses and has gone back to his homeland of the UK. A source tells TMZ that they went to counseling and tried to make it work, but to quote Paula Abdul’s opus Opposites Attract, Johnny goes to bed early and Courteney parties all night. That worked for Paula and MC Skat Kat, but it didn’t work for Courteney and Johnny. And now they’re over.
I always thought these two were good together. I mean, Johnny looks like a second-tier Ralph Fiennes impersonator who moonlights as a serial killer and she looks like the wax puppet he created to taunt his victims. But oh well, now Courteney is free to marry Andy Dick so her name can be Courteney Cox-Dick. Or marry Meat Loaf so her name can be Courteney Cox-Loaf. Or marry Chelsea Handler so her name can be Courteney Cox-Handler. I can do this all day.