Hot Slut Of The Day!

November 25, 2015 / Posted by:

Jarvis Johnson, the Black Friday King of Avondale, Arizona!

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, the day us ‘Mericans lay on our asses all day and build up our strength by stuffing our eating holes with delicious things so that we’ll be 100% ready to elbow a trick in the throat and kick a bitch in the kneecaps while battling it out in a Walmart for a $10 off waffle maker on the holiday that really matters: Black Friday!

On the news here, they’ve been showing wrecks who got in line at Best Buy a week ago and I rolled my eyes at those STUNT QUEENs since they obviously don’t care about the beloved Black Friday holiday. They’re just doing that to get on TV. Jarvis Johnson is probably waiting in line early for the same reason, but at least he’s going all out. Show up and show out is his motto.

Jarvis started waiting in line at Best Buy on Sunday and his set-up is more luxurious and better insulated than some NYC apartments I’ve been in and lived in. Jarvis gave Fox 10 (via HuffPo) a tour of his opulent Black Friday pied-à-terre in front of a Best Buy and it comes complete with a bed, a TV, a heater, a microwave and a fridge. Jarvis also has a sidekick, a kid named Eduardo, who randomly pops up during the tour.

Jarvis said, “the early bird gets the worm,” twice and when it came to Black Friday, I always thought the early bird gets punched in the face by a stronger and meaner ho who shows up at the last minute and shanks anybody in their way. But Jarvis is the expert, so I’m not going to disagree. And I hope that mess of an interview leads to Jarvis and his sidekick Eduardo geting their own show on HGTV.

SHARE
Our commenting rules are pretty simple: If you make any overly offensive comment (racist, bigoted, etc..) or go way off topic when not in an Open Post, your comments will be deleted and you will be banned. If you see an offensive or spammy comment you think should be deleted, flag it for the mods and they'll be forever grateful and give you their first born (although, you probably don't want that).

src="https://c.statcounter.com/922697/0/f674ac4a/1/"
alt="drupal analytics" >