No, these aren’t pictures from the Fighting the Hot Grand Championships of 2015. These pictures are from last night’s NYC premiere of The Big Short where Brad Pitt and Ryan Gosling showed off the matching hairstyles they obviously got from Johnny Depp’s stylist.
I’m not even sure if this is the real Brad Pitt and Ryan Gosling. Brad Pitt looks like what you would get if you put pictures of Aaron Sorkin, Suze Orman, Sliding Doors Goopy Paltrow and current day Johnny Depp in baby morphing software. That hair is either a 90s Nick Carter wig or that grey hair he had on his head the other day was a $2 Anderson Cooper wig from the Dollar General. And Ryan Gosling!
Ryan Gosling needs to pull out his phone and immediately delete the number of the trick who painted up his face like that. That’s a look that a goth high school kid would put together using baby powder and an old eyeliner pencil he stole from the back of his mother’s bathroom cabinet. Dude’s makeup is very newbie emo kid and it’s a tragedy. Ryan should cancel everything and immediately have an emergency FaceTime session with Jeremy Renner, because Hawkeye will teach him how to properly tame and work an eyeliner pencil.