While 75% of One Direction dressed up like pallbearers at a funeral, Harry Styles and his stylist went another direction (I know, it’s way too early in the day and week for those kind of puns) and asked themselves, “WWMW? (What would Maude wear?),” before choosing this hot look. It looks like a pimp suit a grandma would make using the bedspread in her guest room, and I just hope Harry went all the way with the nana look by keeping a handful of caramel squares in his pocket.
Harry didn’t only bring the WTF messiness to his body, he also brought it to the top of his head. I have no idea what his mane is doing:
It’s very “high school girl at the end of prom night.” It’s the kind of hairstyle an 11th grade girl would have after she got drunk in the hotel parking lot with her friends and her updo of prom curls came down as she made out with her boyfriend in the back of a truck. Some think that Taylor Swift squad member Gigi Hadid dissed Harry Styles on the AMAs red carpet, because she gave him a handshake and hugged the other 1D dudes. Click here if you really need to see that RIVETING moment. It’s obvious to me that Gigi got bitchy with Harry, because she was jealous that his freshly fucked hair looked better than her dreadful fake mom bob.
The other 1D twinks didn’t come close to beating Harry Styles in the fashion game, but they did give him a little competition in the hairstyle game by paying homage to some hair idols.
Liam Payne gave us brown-haired and constipated Johnny Bravo:
Niall Horan gave us schoolboy Heat Miser:
Louis Tomlinson gave us brown-haired Kate Gosselin in a windstorm:
Here’s more of 1D and Gigi Hadid at the AMAs last night. Justin Bieber’s wish came true, because he topped One Direction by getting the #1 spot on the Billboard 200 chart. 1D was probably feeling what one feels after Justin Bieber tops them: disappointed and limp. But during the AMAs last night they flipped flopped on a bitch and topped Justin Bieber in Twitter mentions and we all know that’s what really matters.