Hot Slut Of The Day!

November 5, 2015 / Posted by:

Seattle’s glorious gum wall!

One of my aunties worked as a housekeeper and in one of the houses she cleaned, the disgusting, sucio brat ass animal children would stick their chewed gum under the tables like they were raised by trash monsters. She’d ask them to stop, but they never did. Those children’s fingers needed a date with a cigar cutter. Well, this chewed-up gum wall is my tia’s HELL!

hsotdgumwall1

Wikipedia says that the gum wall at Pike Place Market was born around 1993 (“Pfft! Bitch is a newborn!” said Bubblegum Alley) when patrons of the Market Theater started sticking their gum and pennies on that shit. Workers at the Market Theater scraped off the gum twice, but they eventually said “fuck it” and let the gum wall live when officials declared the wall a tourist attraction. But later this month, it will (temporarily) be the end of a nasty ass era when all 1 million (at least) pieces of gum will be steam cleaned off. A rep for the Pike Place Market Preservation & Development Authority tells The Seattle Times that they’re getting rid of all of the layers of saliva and stickiness to save the building or something.

“It was never part of the charter or the history of the Market to have the walls covered with gum,” she said. “Gum is made of chemicals, sugar, additives. Things that aren’t good for us. I can’t imagine it’s good for brick.”

Officials aren’t declaring the wall a gum-free zone and know that it’s only a matter of time before it’s once again as sticky as a trick’s chonies after watching a Charlie Hunnam sex scene.

So if it’s always been your dream to instantly catch all kinds of diseases, you better lick that giant germ wall of doom while you still can. Or you can just make out with Miley Cyrus.

Pics: Wikipedia, CPH

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