No, that dog has nothing to do with this story. I just figured that if we had to look at Randy Quaid’s greasy Santa-on-bath salts face, we should also get a cute fluffy doggie to cleanse our eyeballs with.
Two days after he was arrested by Canadian Border officials for being an immigration-dodging mess, Cousin Eddie has been arrested by American Border officials. I know, you totally didn’t see this one coming, right? CBC News says Vermont State Troopers (please tell me it was Ramathorn and Womack) slapped Randy Quaid and his partner in crazy times, Evi Quaid, with a pair of handcuffs when they tried to slink across the U.S./Canadian border at 8pm last night. Yes, Randy was trying to flee Canada after he was deemed that he wasn’t a flight risk. I guess Randy was trying to pull a “You can’t deport me if I deport myself” power move or something.
Both Randy and Evi were detained and a judge has set their bail at $50,000 each. No word on why Evi was arrested as well, since she’s not exactly the one up for deportation. But I’m sure there’s probably some law on the books about skipping town with your husband who was specifically told to sit tight while they decided what day to send his ass back to California.
I have no idea why Randy and Evi couldn’t just wait for Canada to tell them when it was time to pack their bags and GTFO. So impatient, those two! Personally, I would have stayed in Montreal as long as they would let me just so I could stuff my face with as many Montreal bagels as possible. Border security would need at least three of their strongest employees to drag my ass out. If you’ve ever had a Montreal bagel, you know what I’m talking about. It’s like wood-fired poppy seed-covered crack. If I was about to be deported from the land of bagels, I’d run off to the nearest St-Viateur and eat till I shat circular bagel-shaped poops.
In the event you want to see the newest pictures for Randy and Evi’s mug shot collection, they’re after the cut.
Today I learned: That mug shots taken in Vermont are so Vermont. I wonder if those North Face jackets were provided for them? “We also have props. You can choose either the bottle of maple syrup or the pint of Ben & Jerry’s.”