I may swear off the bong (never) if Tim Gunn keeps at it, because his shady tidbits about his arch rival Anna Wintour hug my soul and take me to happy places. If Tim Gunn dropped daily nuggets about the hilariously bitchy ways of Anna Wintour, the makers of every anti-depressant would go out of business. This is our Prozac. This is better than a damn puppy video.
Tim Gunn first fed us a spoonful of YES five years ago when he wrote in his book about the diva behavior of the Grand Dame of the Death Eaters. Tim wrote that one of the most unforgettable moments in his fashion career was when he watched Anna Wintour’s bodyguards make a fireman’s lock so they could carry her down the stairs and into her chariot. Anna Wintour didn’t like Tim lifting the curtain on her ridiculousness and Tim didn’t give one fuck that she didn’t like it.
Tim was on Meredith Vieira’s show (via UsWeekly) yesterday and he once again refused to bow down to the dark priestess of fashion. Tim told Meredith that after he wrote that shit about the stairs, Anna’s office called his office and demanded that he take it back. Tim dropped a gingham print fart on Anna’s demand. Tim said he wasn’t even trying to be bitchy when he wrote that. He knew it was about getting Anna to the next fashion show quickly, but he doesn’t like how she pretended like it didn’t happen.
“I said it wasn’t a matter of not being able to go down the stairs to descend, it was a matter of speed. She had two bodyguards, who made a firemen’s lock, she sat in it. They wooshed her down these stairs and put her right into her car to get to another fashion show because this fashion show was in the fifth floor of the Metropolitan Pavilion. They had to move her fast. She’s a history revisionist, in her mind it never happened basically.”
Tim doesn’t even care that it ruined his relationship with Vogue, because he says it’s like another planet over there and things are “hostile,” so he wouldn’t want to be on their good side anyway. But he did say that he respects Anna’s “charitable work” (HA!) and then he gave us another tale from the darkside:
“I was [once] on an airplane with Anna Wintour and the flight attendant came up to me and said, ‘Is that Anna Wintour?’ And I said, ‘Yes. It is.’ She asked, ‘Do you think I can say hello to her?’ I said, ‘Well of course. Who wouldn’t want you to greet them? That would be lovely.’
She went over and this man next to Anna Wintour, she was seated at the window and he was at the aisle, rose as she rose her own hand up as a gesture of, this is now an international incident and the man said to her, ‘You have to go away, Miss.’ So she wouldn’t even allow her to lean and say, ‘Ms. Wintour it’s so lovely to have you on the plane.’ I don’t understand it.”
The truth is, that story doesn’t even seem that bad. I would think that if a peon flight attendant dared to speak to Anna Wintour without curtsying or offering their first born as a sacrifice, she’d take off her designer Blue Blockers and turn that bitch to dust with her eyes. So Anna was actually being nice to that flight attendant by not destroying her on the spot. But I still love these stories from Tim. Tim also said that he’s not worried about Anna getting revenge on him.
“She can try to turn me to stone. I don’t think it will happen.”
Historians and mythologists take note. It’s obvious that Perseus and Medusa were real and Tim Gunn and Anna Wintour are their direct descendants, and this is round two! Git her, Tim!
And here’s Medusa Wintour giving her bodyguards a break by not making them carry her around the streets of Paris and Milan this week.