Sandra Bullock May Have Adopted Another Baby

October 1, 2015 / Posted by:

(Side note: A few months ago, Minions crap was absolutely everywhere and I couldn’t escape it. Everything at the grocery store was covered with their ugly faces and that trailer would play all the time. I couldn’t wait for the movie to come out so I wouldn’t have to see their Twinkie dick looking asses anymore. Today, while looking for a picture for this post, I scrolled through ten pages on the photo agency’s website and automatically picked this one without thinking. Those evil Minions have obviously infiltrated my brain. I can rid them from my brain by smoking more weed, right? Right. I’m sure that’s what WebMD says.)

Sandra Bullock must have read about Charlize Theron adopting another kid and said, “Oh no you didn’t, bitch. I better adopt another one too.” That’s exactly what happened. Radar says that Sandra recently made her 5-year-old son Louis a brother by adopting a baby girl. Sandra finalized the adoption and has already brought her daughter home to L.A. Apparently, Sandra’s dog shit vigilante/photographer boyfriend of less than a year Bryan Randall has already moved in with her. A source tells Radar that Bryan is going to help raise Sandra’s new baby:

“Sandra’s made it quite clear to Bryan from the start that she’s looking for a husband to raise kids with. She had the paperwork ready to adopt another child but really wanted to do it with the right man, and Bryan’s been checking every box so far. Everyone knows how terrified she is of giving her heart away again, but Bryan’s incredibly supportive, loving and a brilliant father figure. Sandra says he’s perfect.”

Perfect? Hmmm… We all know how Bryan feels about dog caca. I wonder how he feels about baby caca. It’s going to be really awkward and strange when Sandra’s daughter accidentally gets a little poop on the floor and Bryan picks it up and smears it all over that child’s crib while screaming, “Pick up your fucking baby shit!” That may make Sandra say, “Err, you know that heart I gave away to you, can I have it back?

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