The Dreamboat Of ABC News May Be A Cranky Monster

September 10, 2015 / Posted by:

David Muir, the Disney prince who left the Magic Kingdom to run off to NYC to become a TV journalist, took over for Diane Sawyer as the anchor of ABC World News Tonight last year, and apparently, he just looks charming. Page Six says that inside, he’s all villain and is terrorizing the newsroom, because his rival, Lester Holt of NBC, is beating his ass in the ratings. So yeah, that picture of David throwing ten loads of sneaky smugness was taken as he made his way to NBC to give his old friend Lester a peace offering in the form of a Laxative Latte.

Page Six says that David Muir recently had two big interviews, the Pope and Hillary Clinton, and neither did as well as ABC had hoped. David’s interview with Hillary Clinton got beat hard by NBC Nightly News and his 20/20 special with the Pope basically tied with a repeat of Dateline NBC. A source says that when David got back from interviewing the Pope in Rome, he unleashed a douche tornado on his co-workers and now they call him “Anchor Monster.”

“Despite the biggest ‘get’ in the world — the pope — David is still losing to Lester. David feels under pressure and returned to New York from Rome cranky and has been lashing out at the staff. He screams at the crew unless [ABC News President] James Goldston is around. On an open mike he was heard complaining he wanted less of the reporters’ voices and more of his own during the pope town hall. He’s becoming known as ‘Anchor Monster.’”

A rep for ABC News denied this shit.

If there’s an ounce of truth to this, it’s really not nice of Dreamboat David to take it out on the crew. David, who is reportedly a resident of the glass closet, should take out his frustrations by yelling at me. I can take it. But if David’s going to yell at me, he needs to take off his clothes, because I don’t want him to get all overheated, pass out and hit his head on the floor. David may pass out anyway, so after he takes off his clothes, he should lay down on me to be safe. Then he can yell all he wants. Scream at me, take it out on me, Anchor Monster!

Pics: Instagram, Splash,, Getty, ABC, Tumblr

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