The Blind Item Queen, Giada De Laurentiis, is officially divorced (or as she probably says it, “deeeee-vor-chaid”) from her husband of 12 years Todd Thompson and even though their love is dead, they’ll be bonded for a long time thanks to their child and the $9,000 she has to send his ass every single month.
TMZ says that Giada and Todd didn’t have a prenup, so they split everything up 50/50. This is the prize package Todd got for signing those divorce papers:
– Their $3.2 million house in Pacific Palisades, CA.
– $300,000 in art and furniture.
– A membership to some fancy country club in Bel-Air.
– A piece of their joint bank accounts, which have around $2 million in them.
– 50% of the unpaid advances (totaling around $5.5 million) she’s getting for several cookbooks that are currently in the works.
– $9,000 a month in child support.
– A Porsche.
Giada gets to keep her own Porsche and all the rights to her brand. Todd isn’t getting spousal support, because apparently, he’s almost as rich as her. TMZ says his net worth is $15 million and hers is $20 million. They have agreed to share joint custody of their 7-year-old daughter Jade Marie.
$9,000 a month in child support when they share custody? Either that’s a little extra STFU money or their daughter eats a bowl of solid gold flakes every morning.
If the Italian-American Tweedy Bird of the Food Network is looking to rebound by marrying a skinny fat gay blogger who won’t roll his eyes like other HATERS when she says, “parm-ih-john-o reg-ee-ah-no,” and won’t judge her if she wants to jump on John Mayer’s David Duke dick (again, allegedly), she knows where to find me. It’d be the perfect marriage, but only if we marry without a prenup, because I believe in complete trust (and getting to keep our Pacific Palisades mansion in the divorce).