If you dropped acid before reading Dlisted today (which I always recommend doing), you probably read that headline and then got the image of a doctor cutting Sienna Miller out of a giant black mass on Johnny Depp’s body.
Thanks to Sienna Miller (and the fake baby), American Sniper and Foxcatcher got a lot of Oscar nominations, and well, Black Mass was getting award season buzz (Side note: A huge chunk of me dies every time I type “award season buzz”) until now. The director of Black Mass dun goofed, because he cut Oscar lucky charm Sienna Miller from the movie.
Black Mass is about the life of Irish-American mobster Whitey Bulger (played by Johnny Depp) and Sienna played his late-in-life girlfriend Catherine Greig who helped him hide from the feds for 16 years. (Catherine Greig eventually got caught and is serving an 8 year sentence for hiding Whitey’s.) Sienna is dedicated to her craft so she wore a gutter ass wig (see: above) to play Catherine and she truly exuded “aiding and abetting” drama in her scenes. But I guess director Scott Cooper just isn’t a fan of amazing acting, because he left all of Sienna’s scenes on the cutting room floor.
Scott tells The Boston Globe that Sienna’s role was cut due to “narrative choices.” That’s a new one. Scott says that he decided to focus on Whitey’s life before he left Boston and so his fugitive days were cut out. Whitey’s fugitive days were “less dramatic,” according to Scott. How rude. Sienna worked hard for that role. I mean, Sienna watched THREE Ben Affleck movies to perfect her Boston accent! She said this after filming:
“Up until the day before I flew here, I couldn’t do it and it sounded stupid. And I was sort of religiously watching every film ever set in South Boston: ‘Good Will Hunting,’ ‘Gone Baby Gone,’ ‘The Town.’ Catherine had a thick accent, so I hope I do it justice.”
I can only come up with 4 reasons for why Sienna was really cut:
3. Her accent was a wreck.
It’s obviously not #3 since she watched three Ben Affleck movies, so it’s obviously jealousy. Every actor in the movie (Depp, Benedict Cumberbatch, Dakota Johnson, Juno Temple, Joel Edgerton, Kevin Bacon and Adam Scott) probably demanded that she be cut, because they knew she’d outshine them all.
Who cares about Johnny Depp? Who cares about Whitey Bulger? Scott Cooper should cut everybody but Sienna from Black Mass and make it nothing but 2 hours of her struttin’ around in that hot purple bathing suit. They’d have to change the movie’s name to Hot Ass, of course.