Magic Nursery Pets!
Look at those cracked out messes in animal costumes and diapers. Their pupils are totally dilated because of all of the bad shit they’ve done. Wrecks! That picture should be titled: Miley Cyrus’ VMAs party – The aftermath. Miley Cyrus wishes, actually.
The Magic Nursery Pets were born in…wait for it… wait for it…. the pastel universe of the foolery that was the 1980s. They stuck around until the early 90s and I’m guessing that every last one of them were bought by ravers who stored baggies of Ecstasy in them. They were a part of the Magic Nursery line of toys, which included those Magic Nursery Baby Dolls who were genderless until you pulled off their hat to see if they had a perm (a girl) or were bald (a boy).
Magic Nursery Pets also had their own surprises. Their ears were hidden and when you pulled them out, you discovered if they were a bear, bunny, pussy or puppy. MAGIC! Ghost of the Doll has a description of them:
Each pet holds lots of different surprises! Magic disappearing vest reveals a surprise “Pet-agree” card for a Bear, Bunny, Kitty or Puppy! There are more surprises in discovering the adorable ears and tail. Pets may even turn out to be part of an extra-special litter” Each pet comes with a Magic Nursery surprise T-shirt, pet ID bracelet, and matching child-size bracelet too. The heart on each sweet pet’s nose becomes a star with the warmth of a kiss! Includes a cloth diaper, bottle, and Pet Care Book with fun activities and invitations for a Pet Show!
That description tells me one thing: The Magic Nursery Pets must have been a raver’s dream toy. A raver’s Ecstasy-powered brain probably exploded into glitter and glow stick juice when their Magic Nursery Pet’s heart birth mark became a star after kissing it.
The Magic Nursery Pets are long gone, but their impact still lives today. I mean, doesn’t that swoop bang look familiar?
Justin Bieber, please give credit where credit is due!