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August 29, 2015 / Posted by:

Snapple’s Whipper Snapple! 

I had never ever heard of Whipper Snapple until a few weeks ago when my friend brought it up. She was talking about how she missed Whipper Snapple and was going to make a homemade one in the blender. I had no idea what she was talking about. I figured it was some kind of drug drink using Whip-Its and Snapple. But Whipper Snapple was a drink from Snapple that existed in the late 90s.

Whipper Snapple was just juice mixed with a mountain of sugar and milk. It came in flavors like pineapple orange and strawberry banana. My friend said it tasted like a melted Creamsicle, to which I said, “Then why don’t you just melt a fucking Creamsicle and drink that?” But apparently, Whipper Snapple was smoother and had that secret ingredient Snapple put in their drinks to keep hos in the 90s addicted. That secret ingredient was either heroin or the blood of the Snapple Lady.

Whipper Snapple isn’t around anymore. Snapple killed it around 2000. That sucks. I hate it when I find out that a possibly delicious drink from the past that I’ve never tasted is no longer with us. It’s especially sad when that drink looks like it would be extra delicious with a half bottle of rum.

Pic: Bevnet

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