Just when I start to wonder if there is a God, God pops up and says, “Yup, I exist,” by giving us the gift of extra sweet hypocrisy wrapped in a warm blanket of HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Gawker put their magnifying glass over all the names that were leaked in the Ashley Madison hack this morning and heard the angels sing when they came across the name Josh Duggar. This is the day the lord hath made!
In 2013, while Josh Duggar was working as a spokesperson for the Family Research Council and preaching about how the gays are destroying the precious sanctity of marriage, he was allegedly using Ashley Madison to get himself some side piece cooch. Gawker says that Michelle and Jim Bob Duggar’s oldest child used 2 paid Ashley Madison accounts from February 2013 to May 2015. I’m sure more than one Josh Duggar exists in the world, but Gawker posted the receipts.
One account was paid using a credit card with a billing address that matches the address of a home in Fayetteville, AK owned by Josh’s grandma. The other account was opened in July 2014 and it was paid for using a card card with the address of the home in Maryland he shared with his wife Anna and their kids. That second account was closed in May 2015, the same month that he confirmed that he molested several young girls when he was a teenager. Anna was also knocked up with their fourth kid while her husband was out trying to break another commandment.
Josh had two accounts for a few months before closing one of them. He paid a total of $986.76, which included a $250 “affair guarantee” fee. This mess gets even messier. Josh’s usernames were JOSH_THE_MAN and READY4THISDC. Josh also said on his profile that he was looking for a piece to get into these acts with him:
“Conventional Sex,” Experimenting with Sex Toys,” One-Night Stands,” “Open to Experimentation,” “Gentleness,” “Good With Your Hands,” Sensual Massage,” “Extended Foreplay/Teasing,” “Bubble Bath for 2,” “Likes to Give Oral Sex,” “Likes to Receive Oral Sex,” “Someone I Can Teach,” “Someone Who Can Teach Me,” “Kissing,” “Cuddling & Hugging,” “Sharing Fantasies,” “Sex Talk.”
One should always keep a gallon jug of holy water handy for times like these, because my brain needs to be fully cleansed after imaging Josh Duggar cuddle and get into sex talk while in a bubble bath for 2.
I’m sure Josh will eventually say that he was only on Ashley Madison because he wanted to meet cheating whores and save their sinful souls before it was too late! Or maybe he was really confused and thought Ashley and Madison were the name of two 12-year-old girls.