Celebrity dick Miles Teller reportedly got into one of those eye-rolling bro-fights with director Josh Trank on the set of Fantastic Four. Picture two assholes bumping titties while braying such heterosexual penis insecurity standards as:
“I’ll let you have the first swing!”
“Come at me, dude! Come at me, bitch!”
“You got a problem?”
“I’d much rather be sucking you off right now.”
Ok, that last one is pretty rare but you know one of them is usually thinking it. As you’ve probably heard, Fantastic Four ended up being a fantastic failure. It didn’t just tank. It dove to the bottom of the Mariana Trench and got its face eaten off by one of those horrifying mutant fish with the curved knifey teeth that are too big for its mouth. Trank even forewarned everybody via Twitter.
Entertainment Weekly (via Yahoo) sez that Trank came to regret initially pushing for Teller (and his supposedly highball glass size-and-shaped penis) to play Reed Richards aka “Mr. Fantastic.” Various reports have Josh Trank experiencing a slow and close-to-psychotic meltdown on the set. This didn’t mix well with Teller’s potent combination of vinegar and water. Tits were uncalmed and slapped together one day. Both dared the other to swing, but none were thrown. This is unfortunate because it sounds like Miles would benefit from a blow to the face to knock the Hollywood entitlement right out of his asshole.
It’s been a rough time for me finding out that Miles Teller is a rampaging dickface. He’s a good actor when he’s not in a bullshit movie. And I find his droopy dog face sessy for some reason. But it all makes sense now. I’ve always had a sick lust for hot douchebags. Give me a beefy frat twat with a backwards baseball cap driving his Jeep shirtless and the panty pudding is real. Is there some sort of group I can attend for this? *sad face*
Check out more completely intriguing pics of Miles in NYC with girlfriend Kaleigh Sperry (but none of her alleged Miles ass tattoo unfortunately) in the gallery below.