America’s Most Elegant Couple To Bestow The Most Elegant Baby Upon The World

July 27, 2015 / Posted by:

There’s been so much shitty and depressing news around here that we really needed some uplifting news that will give us hope for our future, and leave it to CoCo and Ice-T to give us that. The undisputed Empress of the Camel Toe has announced that growing in her pink rhinestone-encrusted womb is the heir to her and Ice-T’s kingdom of demure elegance. 36-year-old CoCo is pregnant with the baby she made with her 57-year-old husband of 14 years Ice-T. This will be CoCo’s first child and Ice-T already has two grown kids and a 20-year-old grandson (who is currently facing manslaughter charges). It is a good day when we find out that CoCo will teach another human her ways.

While taping her new talk show with Ice-T on Friday, CoCo told the audience that in a few months, her crown jewel of a vagina will release a bundle of preciousness that is more valuable than the cloud of diamond dust she usually queefs out. For those of us who weren’t lucky enough to be at her show’s taping on Friday, CoCo tweeted the news this morning while pushing the premiere date of her new show.

With this pregnancy, CoCo is going to clench her title as the undisputed camel toe champion. When she steps out in maternity Spandex leggings, her crotch is going to look like an entire nail salon for camels. CoCo’s pregnant camel toe is going to shut down all camel toes.

And as for the baby’s name…..

Since CoCo and Ice-T both have names that can be found on a Starbucks menu, I’m hoping that they name their little baby friend Chai Latte T.

Pic: Splash

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