Night Crumbs

June 26, 2015 / Posted by: Michael K

Dorky blond giraffes Taylor Swift and Calvin Harris have kicked Beyonce and Jay-Z off of the top of Forbes “World’s Highest Paid Celebrity Couple” list. I’m sure Beyonce and Jay-Z will be back on top next year, because Tay Tay and Calvin won’t be a couple anymore and everybody on this planet will eventually drop everything to subscribe to Tidal (no, we won’t) – Lainey Gossip

Charlize Theron broke up with Sean Penn because she realized what everyone else has known forever – Celebitchy

Not pictured: A bunch of Galapagos tortoises who are wondering “Are they are mommies?” while looking at Bethenny Frankel and Carole Radziwill – Reality Tea

Diddy’s son got shit from his coach because his daddy got him a spot on the team – The Superficial

Selena Gomez is trying to bring the sex in her new video, but she looks more like she’s suffering from a serious case of the cramps – Drunken Stepfather

Donald Trump’s crusted over chapped asshole is still hot over Univision dumping the Miss USA pageant – Jezebel

Panty Creamer of the Day: Adam Rodriguez’s nipples – Towleroad

Behold, the Mexican weather girl who is bringing a heat front to the chonies of straight dudes everywhere – IDLYITW

If you need me, I’ll be trying to find peen prints in these pictures of hot pieces in sweatpants – The Berry

Nina Agdal looks hungry and sad on the cover of Cover Magazine – Hollywood Tuna

Julianne Hough looks like a high, patriotic deer caught in the headlights on the cover of Women’s Health – Hollywood Tuna

Jimmy Fallon canceled his show tonight after cutting his finger bad. He either cut it during a drunk mess accident or during a fisting gone wrong – SOW

President Obama brought the church to church in Charleston today – Popsugar

For why is Vanessa Marcil in Lisa Loeb cosplay? – Moe Jackson

Is the “long game” some kind of sex act I’ve never heard of? – Just Jared

Quick Programming Note: Allison is still out with the sicks (that’s what happens when you write about the Kartrashians all day), so J. Harvey is covering for her on Sunday. She’ll be back on Monday.

Pic: Splash

Tags: Night Crumbs

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