Since Kanye West thinks he’s God on earth, he really wants his own personal Jesus and so he made sure that all the embryos implanted in his wife’s rubber chew toy body were dude embryos. When Kim Kartrashian said that she and Kanye were furiously fucking like a desperate prison tailor shop instructor and a convicted killer, she really meant that doctors were furiously working to make an embryo that would grow into a dude heir and continue his dad’s legacy of making eyes roll.
A source tells UsWeekly that both Kim and Kanye wanted a boy to go with their girl and so they shook out the loose change from their cleavage to pay for an expensive procedure where doctors “isolate fertilized embryos of the preferred sex in a lab.” The procedure starts at $17,000, apparently. Kanye’s platinum leaf anus treatments cost more than that, so that money isn’t shit to them. The source claims that Kim and Kanye ordered and bought the perfect boy they’ll name either Wild Wild West, Go West, Kanye The Second or Boyoncé West. The source spilled this out:
“Kanye and Kim are so excited to complete their family. Kanye loves Nori more than anything, but to make his world complete, he wanted a little boy, an heir. Kim always wanted two kids. A girl and a boy.”
This doesn’t surprise me, because Kimye have a little girl to parade around in leather girl tunics for the paps and now they just need a little boy to parade around in leather boy tunics for the paps. But what does surprise me is that Kanye didn’t want to klone himself Dolly-style instead. Why have a “male heir” with half Kanye genes when he could have a “male heir” with full Kanye genes?! It’s what Henry VIII would’ve done! I need to stop, because I’m giving Yeezus ideas and this world is barely big enough for one Kanye-sized ego.
In other Kummy Kakes “news,” Kim is at the Cannes Lions Festival right now and she tweeted about how some drunk, naked crazy bitch tried to get into her hotel room last night. Kim didn’t let her in. What a rude, ungrateful asshole Kim is. I mean, she’s wrong for not letting her mother into her room. Pimp Mama Kris turned Kim into the richest inanimate object in the world and that’s how she gets treated? Rude and uncalled for.
Here’s some pics of Kummy and PMK in Cannes as well as pictures of Kanye partying with Drake, 2 Chainz and Future in Atlanta while wearing a parachute jumpsuit that Blanche Devereaux would’ve worn if she was in the army.