Open Post: Hosted By A Naked Masked Attention Whore Pouring Milk On Himself In A Walmart

First things first: No, this didn’t happen in Florida, but that shouldn’t be surprising since Walmart is pretty much Florida’s embassy.

WOWK-TV says that two dudes were recently arrested in Pike County, Kentucky after a video was posted on YouTube of a guy doing what one does after having unprotected fuck times with Charlie Sheen or Parasite Hilton. The masked mess got naked and poured milk all over his body before running through the store screaming, “I’m on fire!” Because the dudes are geniuses, they uploaded it onto the Internet and after it went semi-viral on Wednesday, the cops were able to ID the messes involved as David Daniels and Timothy Smith.

They were arrested and charged with indecent exposure. They’re still in the clink and waiting to see a judge.

Two things:

1. What a waste of milk. That milk wasn’t squirted out of a cow’s tit just so some dude could pour it on his body before singing out the title of a Bruce Springsteen song in the middle of a Walmart for YouTube hits.

2. A worker at Walmart doesn’t make enough as it is and they really aren’t paid enough to clean up some milk that has touched the sweaty balls of an attention whore.

On the other hand….

I haven’t been to Walmart in years, but if I did go to one and DIDN’T see some masked naked dude give himself a leche shower while wearing white socks and black sneakers, I’d think that I walked into the wrong place.