If the name Gabi Grecko means about as much to you as the name “Kim” means to North West, then you’re obviously not a connoisseur of delicate gold digging blossoms.
Gabi Grecko (who is giving me Leeloo as a Hooters waitress in that picture) is a 26-year-old Florida petunia who became one of my gold digging idols when she got with 72-year-old Australian medical mogul Geoffrey Edelsten and caused an ESCANDALO when she showed up to a funeral done up like a mobster’s hooker mistress circa 1986. Well, the always attention shy Gabi, who is usually allergic to the spotlight, is back in the news in Australia after she and her sugar pepaw got married and announced that she’s got an adorable little blank check growing in her womb. But some people are throwing looks of skepticism at her pregnancy news.
Most women wait until they enter their second trimester before shouting from the top of social media about how they have the CASE OF THE BABIES, but not Gabi. Gabi is only 3 to 4 weeks pregnant, but she already told everyone that contrary to their thoughts, Geoffrey doesn’t just jizz up cum dust and he can still shoot out a live one. Gabi posted a picture of a positive pregnancy test on Instagram, but it didn’t take long for hos to accuse her of pulling a regular Anna Allen. Gabi was accused of trying to pass off a picture of a pregnancy test she found on Google Images as a picture of her own pregnancy test. Gabi later admitted that she threw her pregnancy test away and wasn’t selfie-ready for Instagram, so she just used a picture of a pregnancy test she found on the Internet. I don’t know why Gabi thought she could fool a bitch. I mean, in the picture she posted, the word “pregnant” is on the stick when we all know that Gabi’s positive stick probably had dollar signs on it instead.
Gabi also gave different stories to different media outlets. She told one media outlet that she and Geoffrey planned her pregnancy and she told another that it was a surprise. Because of that, some think that Geoffrey and Gabi made up the baby news for attention. Those two doing something solely for attention?! NEVER! The Florida Holly Madison went on A Current Affair (via Inquisitr) where she asked the hating haters to turn their meanness into niceness.
“They don’t know what’s going on. They don’t want to help. They don’t want to make things better. They just want to attack me and I don’t want them to attack my baby. I want all of those wishes and all of those people out there to be positive towards it because I’m already worried you know. I want things to go right.”
You know, I really need to stop with the gold digger jokes. Geoffrey Edelsten is supposedly “broke,” so Gabi obviously married a 72-year-old man for love and she’s having his baby, because she wants a living symbol of their beautiful union. (And also because when she makes the choo-choo sound while spoon feeding Geoffrey his dinner of mashed peas, she thinks to herself, “This is fun! I want to do this twice as much!) We should all be so lucky to have a Gabi Grecko in our life when we’re 72.